Delicious Ambiguity Is 2 & an update

Hello friends,

Just stopping in today to say THANK YOU for your continued support. I started this blog two years ago and never in my wildest dreams did I think that it would grow as big as it has! Thank you for stopping by and reading, leaving wonderful comments, voting for my blog on popular sites and sharing it with friends. Your support means the world to me and I am so grateful and honored!

If you've been following me since the beginning or during MDAs first year you would have noticed that my posts have become sparse and that I never share anything personal on here anymore.  I took a break needing to go inward and needing some privacy to deal with all of the curve balls that life has been throwing at me these days. But I also choose to not write about my personal life because I wasn't sure how YOU, the readers of MDA, would respond.  

I continue to find huge comfort and relief in others bloggers writing by knowing someone else had been through something similar and therefore removing the loneliness and frustration I've often felt as a parent and as a woman. Some posts have opened my eyes to things I didn't previously understand and have changed the way I think. Taking a break has helped me to understand that as long as I'm not going out there with the intention of hurting or offending there's nothing wrong with expressing an opinion AND that it's actually necessary where blogging is concerned.

I wish there was more time in the day and that I could say with great certainty that you will be seeing a lot more posts around here. However, spending quality time with my son and taking time for myself are still my greatest priorities and will continue to come first. I can, however, promise you, quality posts written from the heart that at times will be messy and convoluted like life. My heart is BURSTING at the seams with stories- about parenting, living gluten free, postpartum depression, abusive relationships, single parenting, weight loss and most recently my sons journey in diagnoses with what I believe to be Sensory Processing Disorder. Did you get all that?!

Seriously, I AM BURSTING with things I need to share and I hope that, you, my readers will respond positively. I also hope to hear your stories and feature some of them on here too. Sharing is a source of great healing and in doing so I hope that together can create awareness, inspire others and that ultimately this blog will be better for it.

Thoughts?

 

Free Printable Words To Live By Artwork

I've been doing a lot of soul searching and daily affirmations and along the way I've been bookmarking these great posters hoping to eventually have enough to share with you:


Somewhere Over The Rainbow from The Swell Life

Babies Don't Keep from Lay Baby Lay

Happiness Is from It Works For Me!

The Glass Is Half Full from Sugar & Dots

You Are Beautiful from It's A Crazy Life

Words To Live By from Shrimp Salad Circus

Life Is To Be Enjoyed from Our Daily Obsessions

It All Comes Down To Attitude from Are They Twins?

For more great affirmations and a daily dose of persective check out Roots Of She, Kind Over Matter and Heal Your Life.


What are your favorite words to live by?

Mommy Moment Mondays #3

Mommy Moment Monday #2

1. Dragonfly Designs

2. The Low Gi Diet: 12 Week Action Plan

4. Beautiful Mess

Thank you for stopping by and following my blog. When I started blogging I never imagined I would meet so many wonderful people and I am am very honored that you let me be a part of your lives everyday. 

This past week Delicious Ambiguity has 231 followers via Google Friend Connect, 53 entries for the Tot Tuesdays Link Up Party, 317 followers via Feedburner, 1890 views and 243 clicks.  Thank you for being so awesome!

Mommy Moment Monday #1

This week I am starting a new feature here on Delicious Ambiguity called Mommy Moment Mondays. It is a chance for me to share some photos and funny stories of my family, share some of my favorite things and showcase followers and commenters of my blog. I got the idea from Natalie over at The Busy Budgeting Mama. I LOVE her "Day In The Life" posts and I hope you will enjoy my Mommy Moment Mondays just as much. So lets rock this Monday, shall we?

1. Joy The Baker-Sit & Stay A While Apple Crisp

2. The Wiggles-Fruit Salad

3. Mama Thompson

4. Cook Clean Craft

Have a great week everyone!

Learning To Love My Baby Tattoos

Three years ago I was living my dream teaching English in Thailand. I had a great job and good friends and was very blessed. Although I didn’t make much money by western standards, I was rich in Thailand and my money went far. I led a very selfish life eating take-out every meal, going to the movies, shopping, spending weekends on the beach and holidays traveling other countries.

Despite all of this, I felt like something was missing. I desperately wanted to meet my “soul mate”, start a family and settle down. Seeing the beauty that the world had to offer suddenly didn’t satisfy me unless I had someone to share it with. So, I cleaned out half of my wardrobe and started to sleep on one side of the bed. I dreamed of having children nearly everyday because those Thai kids are seriously the cutest kids I’ve ever seen.

It was shortly thereafter that I met my partner Shun who swept me off my feet and changed EVERYTHING. We started to plan a life together but I guess it’s true what they say about whatever you put out into the universe comes back to you, because it wasn’t long after that we found out we were pregnant. All of a sudden my life felt like it was crashing all around me. What should have been a very special and exciting time in my life became very stressful and I felt ashamed. Due to many other commitments and problems with visa paperwork we were forced to live on separate sides of the world.

Much of my pregnancy I felt ashamed because people were very judgmental of me being pregnant out of wedlock. I felt guilty because my partner was missing all of the exciting changes and experiences that he should have been a part of. And I was exhausted because I was working two jobs trying to save up for our future together.

By the end of my pregnancy I was huge! I had gained sixty-seven pounds, had so much water retention that I looked like I was going to burst, my ass went on and on and ON forever (really), my hair was a lot thinner and was falling out, and my already big feet grew two sizes. Everywhere I went people commented on how big I was and it would bring me to tears. I worried that Shun wouldn’t love me anymore because I didn’t look like the person he had fallen in love with, and I worried that I would be big and ugly forever. I was terrified of getting stretch marks and lathered on Palmer’s Cocoa Butter Lotion and Bio Oil from the day I found out I was pregnant. But, in the end I was stretched so much to accommodate my son that my knees, thighs, back and belly were covered with them.

I had my heart set on having a natural birth but, because my blood pressure was so high, Kai was so big and he kept having an irregular heartbeat, I was induced a few days before my due date. I was lucky that Shun could be there to experience it and we could welcome our son into the world together. Somehow, despite being induced, I was able to give birth to my ten pound nine ounce son without pain medication.

Shun had to return home and I took on the role of a single mother for six more months. I breastfed and hoped that I would shed the baby weight quickly but my body worked against me and I continued to gain weight. I now know this is because pregnancy and giving birth to such a big baby has left me with pre-diabetes and possibly (still in the process of confirming diagnosis) Celiac Disease. The stress of being alone, having a baby who was very unsettled and the trauma on my body played a huge role in my negativity and self-hatred.

One minute I would adorn my baby and the next I would be avoiding mirrors and photos and resenting him for destroying my body. I hated going shopping because I was so much bigger then I was before. I hated seeing pictures of myself because my otherwise always perfect skin broke out after giving birth and left me with scars on my face. The under eye circles were so dark from being a single mother and having a baby who didn’t like to sleep. I hated the muffin top that stared back at me and was devastated by a body riddled in huge blue and purple-cratered stretch marks. I cried a lot of tears and I spent most of my time at home because I was embarrassed of how awful I looked.

Like most woman I’ve never been comfortable with my body. I never felt thin enough or pretty enough. I hated wearing bathing suits or letting my boyfriend see me naked, but childbirth made these feelings much more extreme. I couldn’t help but compare myself to the “skinny bitches” in Hollywood or at the shopping centers. You know the ones-they bounce back and fit in their pre-pregnancy jeans two weeks after giving birth, don’t have a stretch mark on them and always look put together with their perfect hair and makeup.

I am now nineteen months postpartum and stopped breastfeeding five months ago. It’s only been recently that it feel like my body is slowly healing itself and I am beginning to accept this “new me”.

When I look in the mirror I see breasts that are saggy, a bit lopsided and have stretch marks on them BUT I feel proud knowing I nourished my son with natures milk and gaving him the best start that I could possibly give him.

I see a muffin top hanging over my jeans and thighs that have cratered stretch marks all over BUT my stretch marks have faded a lot over time and the muffin top continues to shrink. Both serve as a reminder of how lucky I am to experience pregnancy and childbirth and to be grateful for it, as many women are not as lucky.

I see a distorted belly button and the crater it noticeably leaves under each t-shirt that I wear. My bellybutton never popped out when I was pregnant. Rather, it was stretched so much that I didn’t have a bellybutton at all. Now I feel guilty for worrying so much about it while I was pregnant and am glad that my body could transform and adapt to carry my son-what an amazing miracle don’t you think?

I still dawn huge dark circles under my eyes from sleep deprivation because my son is an awful sleeper BUT they serve as a reminder of my strength and my dedication to my son. Even exhausted I am always there for him.

I ended up with a lot of stitches from the birth which left me with some pain and discomfort for many months after BUT it has gotten better over time. I cry when I see a funny movie and nearly pee my pants BUT it serves as a reminder that I need to exercise and take care of myself.

Despite the rocky road that brought me to today I feel incredibly lucky and blessed to have a beautiful family of my own. My son is the most amazing little man and every time he smiles at me I know all of the stress, pain and sacrifices were worth it. He likes mommies belly, stretch marks and all. And you know what? I do too. Because they are a part of him. And because even when my son grows up I will always have his baby tattoos to remind me of the precious time he spent in my womb and the beauty that he has created in my life. I am blessed beyond measure.

Pledge To Love Your Body: 

Pledge To Love Your Body

Other inspiring women and their stories: The Shape Of A Mother

Today's Words To Live By

Mother Theresa's Anyways Poem

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered;

Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;

Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;

Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;

Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;

Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;

Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;

Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;

Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God;

It was never between you and them anyway.

A Womans Week At The Gym

A friend of mine forwarded this to me today & I wanted to pass it along to you. Unfortunately I am not sure where it originated from so forgive me for not being able to give credit where credit is due. I'm trying to lose the 30 pounds my doctor tells me I need to in order to get my health problems under control. 30 pounds being the magic number left to shed of the 67 I gained from being preggers. Trying to start a new work out routine is brutal & I can totally relate to what the writer is feeling. This is dedicated to everyone who ever attempted to get into a regular workout routine. If you read this without laughing out loud, there is something VERY wrong with you ;)

A WOMAN'S WEEK AT THE GYM

Dear Diary,

For  my birthday this year, my Husband (the dear) purchased a week of personal  training at the local health club for me.

Although I am still in  great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I  decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try.

I  called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named  Christo, who identified himself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and  model for athletic clothing and swim wear.

My husband seemed  pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep  a diary to chart my  progress.

________________________________

MONDAY:

Started my  day at 6:00 a..m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it  when I arrived at the health club to find Christo waiting for me. He is  something of a Greek god - with blond hair, dancing eyes and a dazzling  white smile. Woo Hoo!

Christo gave me a tour and showed me the  machines. I enjoyed watching the skillful way in which he conducted his  aerobics class after my workout today. Very inspiring!

Christo was  encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from  holding it in the whole time he was around. This is going to be a  FANTASTIC week-!!

________________________________

TUESDAY:

I  drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door. Christo  made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air then he put  weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made  the full mil e. His rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel  GREAT-!! It's a whole new life for  me.

_______________________________

WEDNESDAY:

The only way I  can brush my teeth is by laying the toothbrush on the counter and moving  my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both  pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn't try to steer or stop. I  parked on top of a GEO in the club parking lot.

Christo was  impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members.  His voice is a little too perky for that early in the morning and when he  scolds, he gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying..

My chest  hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Christo put me on the stair monster.  Why the hell would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity  rendered obsolete by elevators? Christo told me it would help me get in  shape and enjoy life. He said some other crap  too.

_______________________________

THURSDAY:

Blockhead was  waiting for me with his vampire-like teeth exposed as his thin, cruel lips  were pulled back in a full snarl. I couldn't help being a half an hour  late - it took me that long to tie my shoes.

He took me to work out  with dumbbells. When he was not looking, I ran and hid in the changing  room. He sent some skinny bitch to find me.

Then, as punishment, he  put me on the rowing machine -- which I  sank.

_________________________________

FRIDAY:

I hate that  bastard Christo more than any human being has ever hated any other human  being in the history of the world. Stupid, skinny, anemic, anorexic little  aerobic instructor. If there was a part of my body I could move without  unbearable pain, I would beat him with it.

Christo wanted me to  work on my triceps. I don't have any triceps! And if you don't want dents  in the floor, don't hand me the damn barbells or anything that weighs more  than a sandwich.

The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a  health and nutrition teacher. Why couldn't it have been someone softer,  like the drama coach or the choir  director?

________________________________

SATURDAY:

Satan  left a message on my answering machine in his grating, shrilly voice  wondering why I did not show up today. Just hearing his voice made me want  to smash the machine with my planner; however, I lacked the strength to  even use the TV remote and ended up catching eleven straight hours of the  Weather Channel.

________________________________

SUNDAY:

I'm  having the Church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank  GOD that this week is over. I will also pray that next year my husband  will choose a gift for me that is fun -- like a root canal or a  hysterectomy. I still say if God had wanted me to bend over, he would have  sprinkled the floor with diamonds!!!

The Month of Oh-Ohs, Owies & OH MY GODS!

Well it has been a crazy month around here. But who am I kidding...it's always pretty crazy around here! I've been blogging a lot less these days & I'll probably continue to blog less for the next little while. And by "less" I mean 2 or 3 times a week instead of 6 or 7! So don't be surprised if you start seeing a wee bit less of me over the coming weeks. I do have good reasons:

1. For starters, as I've been blogging my dust bunnies have been breeding & I've fallen really behind on keeping up with my household duties. My laundry room flooded 4 times in 1 day a few weeks ago which seeped into my hallway & left quite the stinky mess (Talk about bad luck!). I've realized that we've now been living in our townhouse for a year & I have yet to set up my sons room & move him into it (Yes...he's 18 months old & still sleeps in our room. Don't judge me!). In the last month we've had both mice & massive spiders in my house which is enough to make me want to pack my bags & leave Australia forever. Since I can't do that I feel obligated to clean every nook & cranny in my humble little aboad. I haven't done any MAJOR cleaning since we moved in so I suppose I should stop procrastinating & get 'er done.

2. My son is going through a crazy phase of being very naughty & testing boundaries. I find the only time he is well behaved is when he is learning, exploring & kept busy. Otherwise all hell breaks lose in this house. We're talking jumping off furniture, running into walls & scattering every toy around the house so it looks like a hurricane went through it. I'm in the process of starting TOT SCHOOL with my son. I have much organizing & planning to do, as well as creating Montessori resources for him to use. Let's hope that brings me less damaged furniture, missing toys, black eyes & swollen noses. Oh yah, & better behaviour of course!

3. I'm in the process of finding a part-time job because I don't have enough things to do already right?! Hah. The bank calls...

4. I've been feeling really awful lately & have recently went to see my doctor. As it turns out my doctor thinks I have Celiacs Disease AND Diabetes. I have a lot more doctors appointments, tests & specialists to see before I will get a proper diagnosis. But in the mean time I have a lot of research to do as I must change my eating habits, the way in which I cook & the food that I buy. I also need to exercise A LOT more & take more ME time so that I can get healthy & get my life back on track.

5. As always I've got lots of great projects coming your way. But...I haven't taken the time to finish one single project to completion. Fingers crossed my creative juices will start flowing again & they'll be blogged about soon!

Errg..just writing this makes me feel exhausted. I have a lot on my plate right now but I'm certain it will all come together in due time. Moms are superwomen afterall, right? 

I leave you with this super scary photo of the spider that was in our bedroom last week:

Remind me again why I am living in Australia & sharing my home with these things? Its a good thing S is cute & we share an amazing kid together! Otherwise I'd be on the next plane/ boat/ car/ submarine/ train/ hot air balloon home! I've been told it was either completely harmless OR one of the deadliest spiders in all of Australia. Umm..yah. No biggie.

I can, however, tell you it found itself in my toilet & sadly came to sudden death after 3 flushes (& many tears & screams later). RIP poor spider. I am sorry I had to massacre you but I couldn't take the chance of you quite possibly eating my bub for breakfast now could I? ;)

It's A Dog's Life

I’ve spent the last few weeks pondering what is “normal” behavior of a child that is nearly 18 months old & what just can’t be classified as anything remotely close to falling into that category. I can blame justify the fact that K goes through brief phases of making himself vomit on demand by stating that he’s just testing boundaries. I can blame justify the fact that he likes to rip off his nappy & run around the house naked on the fact that it has been a long, hot summer or perhaps he is just ready to be toilet trained early. I can blame justify the fact that he is fearless & climbs on absolutely everything because he is a boy. And I can blame the fact that he often bite me because he is teething. 

K has a nasty habit of putting everything in his mouth. I spend half of my day yelling, “Please get off the table!” & the other half yelling, “Please don’t eat that!” or “It’s not food. It’s yucky.” Or of course the obvious demand,  “Please don’t put that in your mouth!” At which point he does in fact, put the garbage, toys, bugs, rocks, you name it, into his mouth. At which point mommy gets THAT look on her face. You know the one. Every mother has THAT look.  I’m convinced my son gets pure joy & satisfaction rushing through his veins when he sees THAT look. And every single time he runs away as fast as he can certain that mommy won’t be able to catch him this time. Did I mention he dawns a huge accomplished smile on his face whenever this happens? Huge. It’s beautiful but infuriating at the same time.

Last week it had rained a lot in the evenings & while we were playing outside in the backyard there were a few small puddles that hadn’t dried up yet. K lay down on the ground & proceeded to try & lick up the water. Forget that mommy was holding a cup of nice cold water in her hands. Water from the ground tastes better apparently.

My son chews on everything. E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G. My furniture looks like I have a wild untrained puppy living in my small townhouse. But alas, I only have a skinny one year old with 12 teeth that likes to chew on anything he can dig his teeth in. He may only have 12 teeth but they do damage. There are teeth marks on every piece of wood in our house plus the concrete on the stairs. You heard me...concrete. In case you don't believe me here is living proof that he does in fact climb onto the stairs & stands there chewing on the concrete. Which, I might add, is the worst sound I have ever heard.

I’m pretty sure none of these things are normal. In fact, I’ve had to come to terms with the fact that all of my training & background working with children will never prepare me to raise my son. My son does not, nor will ever fit in the cookie cutter mold of what a child is suppose to be like. And no book will ever prepare me for the things he is going to come up with next. Maybe because I am a teacher, I can't help but try to justify or reason everything he does whether it be normal or not. And I can't help but try desperately to figure him out before I have a problem child or THE weird kid on my hands. 

After a recent dinner with S’s family & their 1-year-old puppy I realized that the similarities between my son & their dog are endless. In fact, they are pretty much doing exactly the same things. I may not have a crazy toddler on my hands but a very cute puppy.  That’s right. I said it. I’m a terrible mother comparing my only son to a dog. Please don’t judge me. His “woofs” are amazingly cute & I’m pretty sure that was the angle he was going for anyways.

Perhaps in his mind he is just pretending to be a puppy. And if he is, then I suppose this behavior is somewhat cute & hopefully just another phase he will grow out of.  At least I hope so. Because otherwise I might have a gown man still living in my house, barking at people, chewing on furniture & marking his territory with that cheeky satisfied look on his face & a sparkle in his eye. 

But mommy won’t just have THAT look on her face. She will have had a heart attack.

All in a days work

It always seems as though there is never enough time in the day to get everything in my house done that needs to be. Sound familiar? Not to fret. Here is my easy peezy tutorial on "How to clean your house":

1. Leave the vacuum in the middle of the living room

& teach your toddler how to turn it on:

2. Leave the bathroom door open so your toddler

will eagerly run to the bathroom & giggle hysterically

as he "cleans" the toilet bowl:

3. Get the mop & proceed to clean up the toilet bowl water

from your bathroom floor. Sit down to enjoy your luke warm coffee

& watch as your toddler runs to the kitchen to mop it:

4.  Put the mop away & realize that the garbage needs to be taken out.

Not to worry, give the bag to your toddler. He loves to take out the trash:

5. Reward with coffee:

I should have listened to my mother

The other night I was blessed with a get out of jail house free card & so I took it. It's not the norm to get any free time to myself or to be able to go out alone. I mean, my idea of a good time these days is to go to the chiropractor & possibly splurge on a coffee while I run around like a chicken with their head cut off doing errands. But of course, S thinks that I like that kind of supposed "me" time because I am alone. Now, being able to run errands without a toddler who has his own agenda & the ton of crap necessities he comes with is a walk in the park. But, sometimes its nice to get out alone & actually spend the time doing something enjoyable.

On Tuesday night I got a text from one of the mommies in my group wanting to go to a movie. Although we've tried to make mommy nights happen they never seem to work. But for some reason this impromptu movie night worked out, & at 9pm I rushed out of the house & left my son screaming with his daddy. I stood outside the door & listened for a minute just to make sure he was still screaming he was settling. I know I'm an awful person for hoping K would keep screaming & give his daddy a tiny glimpse into what bedtimes are like for mommy every night. But K didn't do as I wanted & within 2 minutes had settled &, as I'm told, went immediately to bed without fussing. Pfft! I should get out more often, eh?

Anyways, I made my way to the movies & met up with some friends just in time for a bit of conversation before the movie "Valentines Day" started. I'd heard it was an awful movie but I quite liked it. It was cute, cheesy, funny & had a happy ending. A girl needs her chick flicks people & I basked in its glory. In fact, I may have shed a few tear drops & quite possibly a bit of something else. I got really into the movie & was laughing my head off. At one point (Ok..the part where Queen Latifah slaps her ruler & starts talking dirty into the phone...you know what I'm talking about!) made me nearly pee my pants. Not like full on. That's disgusting. But I'd be lying if I didn't admit that I struggled & had to cross my legs & pray the river wouldn't start flowing. Too much information perhaps?! Sorry. I tend to over share. That's just how I roll.

You know, when I was preggers I did kegels like there was no tomorrow. Thank God I did because I was able to have baby sumo naturally even though I really shouldn't have HAD to given how big he was. I  remember a conversation I had with my mom after K was born when she told me I needed to do kegels everyday for the rest of my life or I'd be in diapers. Blah, blah, blah I thought. Who wants to talk about vaginas with their mother, especially when yours was recently damaged beyond repair by that unfortunate big baby beautiful bundle of joy I'd just given birth to?

I attempted to do kegels as time went on but it remained painful for many months after I had given birth & I got lazy. I spent so much time trying to avoid S so I could sleep rather than having any sort of physical relationship with him. Because honestly, what kind of new mother whose baby never sleeps wants any part of doing IT?  Somewhere along the line I completely forgot to take care of my poor,  distorted hoo-haw. In fact, I may have forgotten it even existed. So much so, that I can't remember the last time I did kegels at all.

And so, let it be known I am a twenty-something mother to one by day,  movie goer & pants peer by night. When your mother tells you to do kegels DO them. Or invest in adult diapers & watch movies at home.  I'm just saying...

A New Dinner Time Game

My son is nearly 17 months old so we have been working on learning about body parts. He's a very clever boy & sometimes a cheeky monkey. Last night at dinner he started putting his taco all over his face. Dinner went something like this:

Me: K, why are you putting you food on your head?

(K moves food to his ear).

Me: Does food go in your ear?

(K shakes head "no" & moves food to his eye).

Me: Oh! Oh! Does dinner go in your eye? That won't feel very nice.

(K smiles & moves food to his nose).

Me: Hmmmm...I don't think you can eat your dinner through your nose.

(K giggles).

Me: Where does your food go anyway?

(K quickly puts his taco in his mouth).

Me: Good boy. Food goes in our mouth!

(K lets out a big "Mmmmmm" & flashes the biggest cheeky monkey grin possible. 

Then proceeds to put another piece of taco on his head).

 Now repeat this exact conversation for about 45 minutes until he was finished eating!

I have to tell you I was feeling very annoyed at this new game of his. I've learned not to fight with him when he's eating because it just ends in him continuting to do the same thing defiantly, throwing his food everywhere & not finishing dinner. And of course the next meal he will do the same thing which I am sure is just to push my buttons. Rather that ignoring him I decided to along with it. This time dinner ended in smiles, K finished all of his dinner & we got to learn about body parts in the process. 

I do belive a good bubble bath is in order now though!

I seriously need a do-over.

Do you ever have one of those days when from the moment you wake up nothing seems to go your way? Well that's the kind of day I'm having. Actually, it started out last night with an inability to sleep. Probably because I'm so exhausted from a rough week with a sick toddler & no help. Because of course, when the going gets tough daddy is conveniently never around. Sound familiar?

Anyways, as I was saying I couldn't sleep last night. It was really humid & I couldn't get comfortable. S was hogging the bed & snoring loudly so I tried to sleep in the other room (which is suppose to be K's room but has turned into S's dumping ground for all his crap). I couldn't sleep because there was no fan & I was too hot so I moved to the living room. But that didn't work either because the glare from the outdoor lights was making these creepy shadows & freaking me out. So at about 3 am I moved back the the bedroom & laid there unable to sleep until S got up at around 5. Then I must have passed out from pure & utter exhaustion & slept like a baby until 8am. Thank you K for actually sleeping in today!

I went downstairs for breakfast & when I opened the fridge a glass bottle of Worcestershire sauce fell out onto the floor, shattering everywhere & leaving my kitchen & I covered in it. Good times. I served K peanut butter & jam toast for the 3rd day in a row because I couldn't be bothered to make something better for breakfast after cleaning the mess up. He loved it but covered himself in it top to bottom. What a sticky mess!

So we had a quick shower & then I attempted to get dressed. I didn't feel comfortable in anything because as far as I was concerned I was having a fat day & an awful hair day. Double whammie! Not the kind of day you want to go out in public but I got dressed anyways.

I let K watch some cartoons while I tried to post a witty list I have been working on all week. It was all about why I miss Canada & poking fun of aussies. I was at the top of my game & really got into it. I shot for 50 reasons but had come up with 100. I should have posted it last night when I finished. But I didn't & today it was nothing but gibberish of which I could not fix. Fantastic, clever, witty, humorous, blood, sweat & tears blog post gone. F***! Note to self: Always back up your work! I felt like throwing my lap top through the window but instead I decided to distract myself & make some lunch.

Why not wreck lunch while I'm at it though, right? I burnt the only 2 eggs that we had left to the frying pan because I got distracted & didn't spray the pan with non-stick spray first. Then I dropped a glass on the floor. AND realized I hadn't closed the milk properly & it had leaked everywhere. Good times.

After lunch I changed again because the one outfit I felt comfortable in today was now covered in our lunch. So I changed myself & K, quickly packed a bag to go to playgroup & headed out the door. I should have stayed home & I think deep down I knew this but I felt like I needed a break from myself!

I had troubles getting K in the carseat because S parked right in front of a huge bush. Then once I started driving I got onto the wrong highway & drove 30 minutes before I was able to turn around. Thank you Sydney for your stupid 1 way streets! Got back onto the right highway but got lost again because I missed my turn only to realize the petrol light was flashing. S hadn't bothered to fill the car up & now I wasn't only on empty I was going to be in big trouble if I didn't fill up soon. So forget going to playgroup. I had to turn the aircon off, roll down the windows & hope K didn't boil in the back seat. Turned the car off while waiting at the longest light ever until I could get back on my road to the only gas station I knew in my area. Turned onto the road of the gas station but missed the only entrance/ exit & had to take a one way street all the way through the uni & back around. At this point I'm holding back the tears out of frustration. I had been driving for an hour, was terrified I was going to be stranded with my kid in 30 degree heat & didn't know what else could possibly go wrong. I made it back to the gas station but when I got there I realized I didn't know how to get the gas tank open. And K is screaming. And S won't answer his phone. Eventually, I figured it out & out $20 in because I didn't have time to search for the coupon to fill it for the cheaper price. After I paid for the petrol I couldn't get K back in his seat & he threw a huge temper tantrum in the parking lot obviously hot, hungry & out of patience.

I somehow buckled him in although it broke us both into a full on wrestling match soaked in sweat & I'm pretty sure the people at the gas station though I was beating him. I didn't want to take any more chances to screw the day up & honestly I just needed to have a good cry so I drove home. To hell with playgroup today. To hell with just about everything!

It's only 3pm & its been the crappiest day ever. And now I'm stuck at  home while K struggles to sleep & I try to remedy this awful migraine caused by the days events & the awful maintenance guys & their very loud, annoying & useless leafblower. I mean honestly, whats the point in blowing the leaves around if your not going to pick them up? And why do they always come around whenever K is trying to sleep?

I think tonight will involve a long bubble bath, a bottle of red wine & a chick flick. Hopefully I'll feel refreshed & ready to start over tomorrow. Sometimes I wish our lives had a restart or do-over button.

How about you? Have you had one of those days recently? Please share or link up to your blog post. These kind of days don't seem so hopeless when we know we're not alone :)

You've Gotta Train Them While They're Young

I've been offline lately because I'm having a lot of pain in my right hand and arm these days. I'm not sure if it's acting up again from when I was pregnant and had trouble or if its something else. Either way my right hand looks like a claw, feels like dead weight and has been useless to me for most things lately. I also have a huge bruise on the top of my right hand and have no idea where it has come from. I honestly woke up with it the other day and have been wearing a carpal tunnel wristguard ever since. I should probably haul ass to a doctor about it. But then she'd have to take a full afternoon off as I list off all of the other ailments I have, but haven't gone to the doctor for yet! It just seems like there's never the time or the money to get them taken care of. It must be the whole "selfless mother" thing because I rush to the doctor if  K has the slightest bit of a problem but here I am with a bad back, screwed up knee, claw hand, bad dry patches all over my skin and I'm pretty much blind as a bat! All since having my son. I tell yah, he really messed me up. But it was definitely worth it!

Aside from the claw it's been a good week over here. I've been cleaning a lot and am almost caught up on all of my laundry and housework.  My son has been spending most of his time "helping" me do the housework which has been super cute. He has tons of toys to play with but spends hours playing with the vacuum instead. He loves it so much that the other day at playgroup he found a Playschool vacuum and spent nearly 2 hours vacuuming the raisins and Cheerios off the floor that the other toddlers kept dropping. It's so cute to watch him move toys and furniture out of the way just like I do. I'm glad he likes to help me and we have lots of fun "folding" the laundry etc. But I am a bit worried that I clean to much or am turning my son into a clean freak. The other day I caught him in the bathroom with the toilet brush scrubbing the toilet! Not even kidding. Now if only I can teach S to do it!

S is convinced I'm turning our son gay. Possibly because I let him wear my headband sometimes and tell him its "pretty". But most likely because we saw a little Korean boy frolicking at the park last weekend wearing a puffy sleeved pink tutu and S has been having nightmares ever since. I think that putting on a headband and helping mommy do housework is normal for most toddlers, girl or boy, and a far cry from wearing a tutu! And honestly I really don't care if K wants to wear a pink tutu and frollick in the park. I have fond memories of my little brothers playing dress up in skirts, heels and my moms old purses. And hey, they both turned out okay!

I like to think I'm preparing K to be a good husband someday as every woman knows you have to train them young! And should my headbands and housework have anything to do with making my son gay then so be it. I'll have a hell of a good shopping partner one day!

I have tons of recipes, a few house organization posts & a Valentines gift with free printables that I have been working on. Please bear with me as I'll probably do a day of a massive amount of posts once my hand is working. Until then I leave you with this picture of my son vacuuming:

Happy cleaning!