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Friday, July 16, 2010

Submitted By You Saturdays: Things You Never Thought You'd Say

Happy Saturday everyone! I've been catching myself saying the craziest things to my son lately and have been getting quite a good laugh. Today I thought we'd start the weekend off right with a good giggle.

Today's question:
* What's the funniest thing(s) you've ever caught yourself saying to your kids?

Here's my top 3:

3.  "Sweetheart, please for the love of God STOP chewing on mommies tampons!"
(After finding K on the bathroom floor with yet another box of tampons chewed through.)

2. (K is putting all of his bath toys in the toilet and splashing around in the toilet bowl) 
"We don't play in the toilet water. Bath toys are only for the bath." 
(K grabs a handful of toilet water and begins to drink it.)
"No!!! PUHLEASE don't drink water from the toilet either. It's dirty." 
(K smiles and in a proud voice proclaims loudly, "Mmmm....")

1. (K bites my butt quickly followed by my ankle and then leg)
"We don't bite mommies butt....Or ankle...Or leg." 
(K bites his own hand then starts crying)
"It hurts when you bite doesn't it?"
(K bites MY butt AGAIN and giggles)
 "Please STOP biting mommies butt. GRRRR..."
(K copies me and growls back, "GRRRR...")

Some people's kids, eh? I can't wait to hear your funny quotes! 
Do you have a question that you'd like to be featured on Submitted By You Saturdays? Submit it HERE.

Have a great weekend and thanks for the comment love!


  1. I had to tell my 2 year old son "Please don't brush your penis with your toothbrush". Ha, never thought I'd say that!

  2. I have five kids so I say crazy things almost every day ... a couple of weeks ago I found myself saying, "we don't eat other people's toenails".

  3. One than once I have said "We do not play in vomit!"

  4. "Stop licking the window!!" I say this about a dozen times a day..

    Also, "don't bite my (butt, breast, stomach, thigh, etc..)!!!"

    lol atleast you know you aren't alone in having to say don't bite me!

  5. When my son was younger he had a funny habit. We were constantly saying "Please stop slapping your peepee!" We constantly have to say "Please stop touching your nipples" to our 4 year old daughter who is fascinated with nipples {hers, mine, daddy's, stranger in the changing room at the Y}. Recently I got to say "NO. DON'T TOUCH THE POOP. PUT THE POOP DOWN. DON'T SQUEEZE THE POOP. STOP IT!" This was said to my one year old after she relieved herself in the bathtub. Luckily I got to her before she decided to put it in her mouth.

  6. Hehehehehe. Thanks for such a good laugh. Im sure Ive said things but none as funny as yours.

  7. "Please stop licking the coffee table." That's one of the tamer things I've had to say. I never thought I would have to say things like that let alone look really serious as I'm saying them.

  8. Oh my gosh. I'm almost crying reading these comments. Hilarious stuff!

    And I'm sure I've had to say something like that to my son, but for the life of me, I can't remember anything right now!

  9. I've said tons of crazy things, but the best story I can think of right now is what my son said. He was misbehaving (he's four and we're at that stage...) while we were at my aunt and uncles, and I put my head down in my hands with my elbows on my lap (trying to get a grip) and he very seriously says to my aunt "look, Bon Bon- look at mommy. She's praying. She's praying for a new kid!" I laughed until I cried and explained that I certainly didn't want a new kid- just for him to listen sometimes!!! He was pretty amused with himself too. Good times!

  10. Thank you all for sharing! These are absolutely hilarious. I just about peed my pants when I read them-yet another reminder I better do some more kegels! :P


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