2 years ago I was a fearless jet setter traveling around the world, teaching English as a second language, experiencing the beauty of other cultures, countries and the worlds wonders. There was something so liberating about flying by the seat of your pants with no responsibilities. I led a selfish lifestyle but through my experiences I learned to be selfless. I experienced many things that so many people could only dream of doing but after a while it became a bit mundane. My lifestyle lost its excitement. I began to feel empty. I longed for more. I couldn't help but wish I had someone to share those moments, landscapes and experiences with.
I began reading "The Secret" by Rhonda Byrne and after finishing it decided to clean out half my wardrobe and begin sleeping on the right side of the bed. I figured if I was ever going to get the things I longed for most I would have to make room for it in my life. And so I did.
It is true that what you put out there will find you. If you visualize it and believe in something with your whole heart the universe will find a way to bring it to you. So much of life is unwritten and it isn't about knowing what is going to happen next. It's about opening your heart, accepting what is given to you, standing up to the challenge and making the best of it. One minute you are sitting on the top of a cliff overlooking Ankor Wat at sunset and the next you are up to your elbows in poopy diapers, responsibilities and a wardrobe with not a single piece of clothing that fits you properly or doesn't have a stain on it.
Today I am a stay at home mom to my very busy and inquisitive one year old son. I have a man who loves me and I live in Australia- the country I waited and dreamed of living in my whole life. On the outside I have the perfect life. I wake up to the most beautiful little boy and his sloppy wet kisses. But my reality is that I run around in circles trying to keep him clean, fed, clothed and stimulated. I struggle to be patient and teach him to be loving, strong, independent and a respectful human being. I cook, clean, organize and take care of the daily responsibilities of the household. Some days I forget to eat. Somedays I forget to shower or can't be bothered to change into something other than my pajamas. I can't remember the last time I blow dried my hair or put makeup on. Some days I don't even feel like I'm a human being.
Time passes quickly and the days blur into one another. I wonder if I did alright today. If I could have handled the days challenges better. If I should have accomplished more. If I accomplished what I needed to but neglected him in the process. I spend my days running, thinking, worrying about everything and everyone else in my life and in the process I forget to live MY life. I forget to take time for myself. I forget to stop. To breathe. To take a minute and reflect. To be grateful for my blessings even though some days they feel like more of a burden. I forget to see the beauty and happiness that simple things can bring. I can't help but wonder on those really hard days why I asked for THIS.
This blog is dedicated to lifes blessings. To the family and friends who keep me sane. To all the moms out there who can relate. I hope that together we can laugh, cry and be real with one another. I hope that each one of us can take the time to stop, take a deep breath and be grateful for all that life has to offer. And I hope that along my journey I can share with you a bit of inspiration. Together lets make life a little less ambiguous.
Thanks for stopping by...